My drug choice was more. When i was in my teens, I truly believed I drank and took drugs for recreation ..whether it was to socialize, hang out with the so called 'cool people or emulate my favourite rockstars and movie stars. Eventually the drugs became a dependency , I knew that deep down I was escaping reality and running away from life and indeed myself . I carried feelings of inadequacy, abandonment, abuse, trauma plus a low self opinion that I wasn't enough The more drugs and booze I consumed as I got into my late twenties -The more I knew i was trying to eradicate my feelings ...I didn't like myself very much.
I am 33 years in recovery. I am employable, I have my family back in my life . I have solid stand up friends . I have been self employed for most of my recovery. I have travelled across the world with yet more places to visit . My creativity has flourished; whether it was running a record label & studio , DJing, or my latest artistic passion -creative writing.